Occasionally I need to rant so I can stop thinking about stuff, so feel free to ignore the following rant.

I hate drama.  Drama isn't something that ever just happens, its created by humans, and its generally a complicated situation mostly involving worthless human ego, because someone's feelings are hurt. Its not valuable, isn't usually sensible, it crap.  We often call drama situations "High School" or other dismissive names, because it used to be something you mostly had to deal with in high school, but as the whiny "touchy feely" types started saying we should express our feelings when something makes us feel bad, now we have to deal with this crap as adults too.

I kinda blame Star Trek TNG.  Anyone tried to watch it now decades later? I loved it as a kid, I get bored or irritated if I try to watch it now, I keep wanting to yell at Picard "Don't put your ship in danger, they're hostile, attack back or leave!"  But whatever.

So a while back, I had a party, and 3 friends I wanted there.

One of the friends was in the middle of a divorce with one of the people and had just broken up with the other.   That friend never shows up if I invite them, even after saying they would, but always wants me to come visit them. 
The friend who was getting a divorce always came.
The last friend rarely comes, but is friends with my gf and hangs out with her.

So in this scenario, if I want as many of my friends to come to my party, but no drama.  The answer seemed pretty easy, if I invite all of them, even the friend who "never" comes but yet still wants me to come to his things might come, just to hang out with who he is divorcing, might fight with the person who he broke up with, and if neither of those two were there, might not show up at all since he normally doesn't show up anyways.

The friend who always comes to my invites might not show up if she thought her ex was showing up, since she didn't want drama.

The friend who rarely shows up, and was invited but didn't show up, might have shown up and gotten into an argument if the 1st person was invited.

So I didn't invite the "friend" who never showed up at my things, and invited the other two.  The party was drama free.  Of course for some reason the friend who wasn't invited was told about it. 

Now honestly, if I talk to that friend 2-3 times a year, have few mutual friends, live 45 minutes apart, don't work together, what is the chance that he would find out about it? In fact, why would I even think about it, I don't need to avoid the issue or "hide" the party, because hes someone I rarely see, ignores my invites 95% of the time, in fact really doesn't act like my friend at all.  Probably because I decided to only go to someone else's invites as often as they go to mine, if they're not willing to drive 45 minutes why would I be???  But yet that person was told, by both of his exes?  Why would they go out of their way to tell him, especially when they said they don't want drama?  I have no clue, and its a bit frustrating, because I still hear about it, 2 months later. 

Now the reality is that me and the one person "aren't" friends, we're acquaintances, and distant acquaintances at that, we've hung out a few times, gamed together a bit, but almost exclusively at his house 45 minutes from mine.  "My" friends are the people who come to my game nights fairly regularly, or who randomly want to meet up for dinner, or show some interest in my projects without me talking about them.   People as interested in what I'm doing as I am in what they're doing.  I hoped that maybe I'd become friends with him one day, because he seems cool, but he made it abundantly clear how much he wanted to move away from Vegas, and if we can't be friends when we're 45 minutes apart, at least not without "me" being the one who constantly visited "him", I don't see how we'd ever be friends when he lives in another city. 

And now we may never be friends, because he wants to be upset that after ignoring my invites forever I finally stopped inviting him?  Meh, whatever. 

Rant done.